A Bit of Discordian Magic

[ecosophia]

Ye have locked yerselves up in cages of fear -- and behold, do ye now complain that ye lack freedom!

--"The Epistle to the Paranoids," Principia Discordia

 

Earlier this week in my Magic Monday open post, the discussion turned to Discordianism, that remarkable metaphysical movement disguised as a prank (or prank disguised as a metaphysical movement). It occurred to me that evening that there is in fact a potent Discordian magical working that might help clear away some of the psychopolitical mess we're in right now. 

 

Look around you, and unless you happen to live in one of the few relatively sane corners of the world, you're probably beset by crazed control freaks who are frantically demanding that everyone has to obey an increasingly ornate list of regulations meant to control what amounts to a moderately bad cold virus. Take the vaccine!  If that doesn't work, take more! Lock down the country!  If that doesn't work, do it again! Wear two masks, three masks, four masks, a hundred at once!  No matter how badly the policies fail, few people in authority are willing to do anything but double down on them. In Discordian terms, what's happened to them has a good straightforward name:  the Curse of Grayface. 

 

A bit of metaphysics may be useful here. The diagram in the upper left is of course the Sacred Chao, and its two sides are the Hodge and the Podge. The Hodge (the one with the pentagon) is the principle of order, and the Podge (the one with the apple) is the principle of chaos. When the Hodge reaches its extreme level, the Podge comes in to balance it, and vice versa. When the Hodge gets stuck in place, you get the Curse of Grayface, and the necessary cure is a dose of Podge. This, in turn, may be administered by means of that classic working of Erisian magic, the Turkey Curse. 

 

You'll find the instructions here. Read them carefully, and if you're minded to, perform this daily at 5:23 pm, concentrating on the intention that the working dispells the Curse of Grayface from the world, and especially from the crazed control freaks mentioned above. (If the time isn't convenient for you, do it when it's 5:23 pm in some other time zone.) Please pay close attention to the cautions given in the text. If you're wondering why I'm suggesting something so self-evidently silly, please read this as well. 

 

With that said -- 

 

GOBBLE, GOBBLE, GOBBLE, GOBBLE, GOBBLE!  

Comments

[sea_spray]

Reading the instructions confuses me, though I feel like that's deliberate.

"If its stupid and it works, it's not stupid"

[ecosophia]

Embrace the confusion, and go ahead anyway.

[(Anonymous)]

Eris
Eris
Eris
Eris
Eris

Discord
Discord
Discord
Discord
Discord

[(Anonymous)]

I‘m not that familiar with Mandrake anatomy, and in particular with how they would move their arms, especially with regards to sexy giantesses.

JMG, you wouldn‘t by any chance be open to recording an instructional video, showing us how to perform the movements correctly?

Milkyway, doing her best to look very innocent ;-)

[ecosophia]

You can tell that this was published in the 1960s. The Mandrake in question is this gentleman:


As for the video, well, why don't you video yourself doing your best, and I'll offer suggestions for improvement. ;-)

[(Anonymous)]

I need to go dig that book out. Remembering Robert Anton Wilson and what triggered him, brings all this back out for some fun. Then I'll go back and reread "Another Roadside Attraction" (Tom Robbins, of course) just to keep the humor that once was - looking for that comedic hero proposed in books gone by ("Muddling" -Johnson). Thanks for this... coboarts

[ecosophia]

You're most welcome.

Why 5:23 pm?

[(Anonymous)]

Why 5:23 pm?

I have a feeling the answer may be: why not?

Anyway, I am feeling better already. It’s working! The ridiculousness of this Turkey Curse somehow seems a fitting response to the ridiculousness here in Canada. I was thinking of gobbling north at 5:23, as that’s where my provincial legislature sits. Or I could point it east at the feds. Or maybe moving it all around in a circle will feel good as the nonsense is all around.

Gobble gobble

Re: Why 5:23 pm?

[ecosophia]

For a change, there's actually a straightforward answer: 5 and 23 are sacred Discordian numbers. That's also why I posted it on a Thursday, since that's the fifth day of the week. As for choosing a direction, well, since we live in non-Euclidean space, no matter which way you point, it eventually gets everywhere... ;-)

[(Anonymous)]

As a further tonic for a Podge deficiency, the SNAFU Principle is well worth a read. Swap the word "software product" with "vaccine" and embrace the chaos https://www.techfak.uni-bielefeld.de/~joern/jargon/SNAFUprinciple.HTML

[ecosophia]

Funny. I hadn't seen that used as an illustration for Hagbard's Law -- that's the other name of the SNAFU Principle -- but it works. Thank you for this!

It's working

[hearthspirit]

I've been waiting to share this picture of a grounded barge with you, because from some angles, I thought it was evocative - especially on Sunset Beach - of, perhaps, a large military vessel...

But now there's a sign blocking it, it is much better, and it is clear who to thank*: https://www.vancouverisawesome.com/local-news/vancouver-park-board-unveils-barge-chilling-beach-sign-at-english-bay-4868142

*some context on the local humour of the sign: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dude_Chilling_Park

Re: It's working

[ecosophia]

Thank you! That seems highly relevant -- not least because, ahem, several other emblems of progress are high and dry in various senses right now.

And I thought of the aircraft carrier, too. ;-)

[grandswamperman]

Hail Eris! All Hail Discordia!

[ecosophia]

καλλιστι!

All hail Discordia

[(Anonymous)]

Well I just finished the west coast 5:23 banishment and my dog, Rosie the Aussie liked it.

Annette

Re: All hail Discordia

[ecosophia]

Rosie is obviously an enlightened being.

[sinners4diseasecontrol]

Oh gosh I'm going to try this in my lead-up to the solstice, and if I like it I'll continue.

[ecosophia]

By all means!

[goats_and_roses]

There's one checker in the grocery store who gnashes his teeth and gets rather purply-faced when I come through his line without a mask. Next time I see him, I will give him a good dose of Turkey Magic! This should be fun.

This...

[(Anonymous)]

is the most sensible suggestion I have heard this last two years

Re: This...

[(Anonymous)]

Beats wearing a mask.

—Princess Cutekitten

[(Anonymous)]

Would there be any issues with someone who does Celtic Golden Dawn work performing this ritual?

If it’s safe, how often can I perform it? Daily?

[ecosophia]

So long as you keep it separate from the CGD work, it's fine, and yes, you can do it daily, at 5:23 pm.

breakthrough

[(Anonymous)]

Lately surfing has felt an awful lot like driving in traffic, and for those who haven't driven in traffic since the pandemic got going consider yourself fortunate. Surfers are shouting at each other in the water/parking lot, playing increasingly childish psych out games, and everyone has a story about why it's okay for them to be a Spiny-nosed Peckerfish. It used to be like this at a few select spots where the young men congregated to compete with each other, but now it seems like it's spread everywhere. What I've noticed is that a lot of them are wearing miserable expressions even if they are getting lots of waves, and their inability to have a good time despite being "successful" is inspiring them to take out this frustration on others.

Curse of Grayface is a wonderful description of what is going on, and apparently the rules, regulations, and rigid social structure of an increasingly totalitarian society have seeped out of their rusty containers and contaminated the watershed all the way down to the ocean.

For the first time in a long while I actually left the water feeling successful yesterday, and it was because I specifically flouted convention and followed my own path instead of being absorbed into the horde mentality. This subject came up in meditation this morning as it was obvious that I had changed the outcome by changing my mind (or rather listening to intuition), and it begged to be analyzed in order to figure out how to get repeatable results. Surfing should be fun, right? Otherwise what's the point?

So anyway, if you happen to be in this neck of the woods and see me Turkey Cursing the lineup before I paddle out then come on over and say hello. The fact that you know what I'm doing means we will probably get along.

Re: breakthrough

[ecosophia]

I'm sorry to hear that surfers, of all people, have fallen under the Curse of Grayface. May your magical working triumph!

Kallisti!!!!!

[(Anonymous)]

Hail Eris!!

Re: Kallisti!!!!!

[ecosophia]

All hail Discordia!

gobble!

[randomactsofkarmasc]

Is this a ritual that can be performed multiple times a day, so long as it is 5:23 somewhere?

Re: gobble!

[ecosophia]

Yes, it can be done up to 5 times a day.

[(Anonymous)]

Did it and it worked !
OK the time here was 12.15 but I figured that was 5 hours 23 minutes since 6.52 so why not :)
thank you !
Luksalong

[ecosophia]

That's a very Discordian way of calculating the time... ;-)

Killing Sacred Chaos

[(Anonymous)]

All hail Discordia!
All hail Eris!

Here is a song by one of my favorite newer bands of the past few years, Slothrust. They play in a fun grunge rock style. I offer it in the way of a different "doublingdown" and killing sacred chaos.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=31gBizKYAnc

The song is Double Down.

Here are the lyrics:

I do what I want
I say what I want
I wear what I want
I'm walking away
You know I don't mind
I chill by myself
You know I'm flyin' high
I'm way up in the sky
Don't even have to try
'Cause I can see everything

Oh don't you dare
Go and push me around
'Cause I'll double down
'Cause I don't care
No not at all
And I never fall
And every time
I roll the dice
Snake eyes never come as a surprise
Dismantle you
With your own tools
No time to explain
You know I'm flyin' high
I'm way up in the sky
Don't even have to try

'Cause I can see everything
You ain't ever gonna get me down
You ain't ever gonna get me...

You know I'm flyin' high
I'm way up in the sky
Don't even have to try
'Cause I can see everything

You ain't ever gonna get me down
You ain't ever gonna get me down
You ain't ever gonna get me down
You ain't ever gonna get me down

.:. .:. .:.

"In eternity there is no time, only an instant long enough for a joke."

Re: Killing Sacred Chaos

[ecosophia]

I like that. Thank you.

[(Anonymous)]

Since there are other Canadians here, would anyone be interested in gathering before Parliament Hill in Ottawa (or any of the provinces' equivalent) to do this as a public mass working?

[hearthspirit]

I am regrettably (maybe not sure that's the word to pair with being in Ottawa) not in Ottawa, but I like this a lot.

This is right out of the foundational book on ruthless exercise of political power I use in my own life; the Shang Tzu.

"If things are done that the enemy would be ashamed to do, there is an advantage."

Now, disclaimer, based on the rest of his oeuvre, I may not be taking it the way Lord Shang intended, but it is very effective, nevertheless.

Parliament is on break after today, though. After that, they all go home, and you could face pretty much anywhere.

[(Anonymous)]

I take it this is supposed to be directed at - crazed control freaks? Care to suggest any crazed control freaks or shall I pick one at random?

[ecosophia]

Nah, the goal is to change the psychic atmosphere so that crazed control freakishness stops being so contagious. Let the individuals in question come to their senses in their own time.

[(Anonymous)]

The Turkey Curse certainly makes me feel better.
Let's see what regular practice will do...
Rhydlyd

[ari_ormstunga]

It is done. I shall continue until this madness has abated.

Emperor Norton

[(Anonymous)]

Remember Emperor Norton!

Re: Emperor Norton

[ecosophia]

His imperial majesty definitely deserves to be remembered...

[ivn66]

All of a sudden I could really go for a hot dog this evening.

[(Anonymous)]

Did it yesterday, immediately felt the dread lift and 20 minutes later got involved in a spontaneous water pistol fight with my son. Today I turned an unsolicited government fox booster letter into a fire safety demonstration for him. TSW. Let's keep this rolling.