I'm so sorry you and James are going through this-and send you blessings. I do believe in holding out hope to the very end, including the potential miracle of IV/Fen treatments, while also accepting that death could be near.
I took care of my father at home as he was dying. He had medication to help with swallowing/nausea but was essentially unconscious the last week (maybe that was the morphine). I used a small, wetted sponge every hour or so to keep his mouth moisturized-but not so much as to actually drink. Since he could not swallow, it could have gone into his lungs. I think singing softly nearby can help. They can feel our presence. The change in breathing was a clue that he was close with small, almost rhythmic "puffs" of air for the last hour or so. I sat quietly with him after the last breath, opened a window and lit a candle near it. I hope you have others nearby to help you and offer support. You are doing an amazing service to your beloved and demonstrating incredible character.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
branchandroot
(no subject)
Date: 2024-04-04 06:32 pm (UTC)I took care of my father at home as he was dying. He had medication to help with swallowing/nausea but was essentially unconscious the last week (maybe that was the morphine). I used a small, wetted sponge every hour or so to keep his mouth moisturized-but not so much as to actually drink. Since he could not swallow, it could have gone into his lungs. I think singing softly nearby can help. They can feel our presence. The change in breathing was a clue that he was close with small, almost rhythmic "puffs" of air for the last hour or so. I sat quietly with him after the last breath, opened a window and lit a candle near it. I hope you have others nearby to help you and offer support. You are doing an amazing service to your beloved and demonstrating incredible character.