I suffered from terrible mental health through covid lockdowns (like many). Severe intrusive thoughts, general lethargy, the works (and no, I do not usually suffer from such things). However, thanks to what I've learned from your teachings, I was able to keep it fairly well together, whereas some people I know are still deteriorating. I literally found part of myself, presumably the will, able to identify that I wasn't my mind, which was losing it. Since then, I have recovered, but no, I am not the same.

My take is that once your regular mind (presumably your middle and lower astral parts) starts to realise your higher bodies are developing (and I think during a crisis, your mental body likely gets a severe workout, however poorly structured it may be), it plays up. I've undertaken some experiments (no, I don't recommend them), where I can sort of withdraw into my mental bodies, and I find, yes, my normal mind starts running back to the same bad old places (the 'imp of the perverse' is a good phrase to describe it).

My theory is that mental distress - whilst controlled - is worse if you are witnessing it from a higher body. Of course, it's worse for you, not others, because you've got it under control. Self-reflection, at least for me through this experience wasn't fun at all, because I realised just how much crap hides in the shadow. But at least I realised it.

I suspect the watcher/dweller on the threshold comes from a similar place?